The holiday season is this time of year when I tend to take stock of my life. I think about where I am, where I’m going and what I’m thankful for. I don’t do New Year’s resolutions, but I do think about things about myself that I’d like to learn more about, or other things I know I need to work on.
I think about places I’d like to visit with my family, with my husband and also on my own.
I think about stories I’d like to write and others I’d like to read. I remember friends I haven’t seen in a while and think about new friends I’d like to get to know better.
I dream of the pounds I’d like to lose and the confidence I’d like to gain. I imagine being strong enough to let go of past pains, being tough enough to let go of fears and worries, but being vulnerable enough to let people in.
I wonder if I kissed my kids enough, if I yelled too much, or if I let days slip past without notice.
But, I also take stock of the past years positives, evaluating and reflecting on just how far I’ve come.
I spoke in front of a crowd of 500 people, a feat that would have had me cowering in a corner only a year before.
I got a promotion at work to a job I never would have thought I could do.
I let go of a volunteer position that I loved but that was draining me, and felt freer for it.
I watched my kids have successes and was there to share their joy.
I spent time on the water with the people I love the most.
Every year brings growth and joy and so for the coming year I have a few ideas: See more of the world. Let more of myself out in writing. Read every day. Spend as much time as I can cuddling with my kids and my husband and my dog. And most importantly, I will endeavour to remember that I’m not perfect, and that’s exactly the way it should be.
Amber Regamey Marsh